Control vs Approval?

This exercise can help us see how we may be getting in our own way by trying to control a situation. It can also show us how the need for approval can hold us back.

Preparation: Have your journal ready to take notes.

One Minute Meditation: Take a moment to relax, take a few deep breaths, and center yourself.

Begin the Session: Answer the questions below. Take your time and explore each question to the fullest.

What is something significant that is currently happening in your life or has happened recently?

If any, what are some of the ways you seek to control this situation?

What are some of the ways you seek approval in this situation?

Now on a scale of 1-10, ten being the most honest you can get, how would you rate how honest you are with yourself? Circle one: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Now back to the thought of control vs. approval. If you had to choose, would you choose to have total control or total approval in your life?

For the purpose of this coaching exercise, which would you prefer: Being and having total control of your world and life or having everyone 100% approve of you?

What do you notice about the need for control or approval in your life?

What does it mean for you when you don’t have complete control or everyone’s approval? How does that show up in your life?

Based on your answer, what changes would you be willing to take regarding control and approval?

Now, are you ready for the BIG question? Would you be willing to give up your need for control or approval?

Imagine your life free of the need for control or approval. What would that look like and feel like?

When you think of choosing to give up the need for control or approval, does that feeling add excitement to your life or add anxiety?

One of the most significant aspects of Life Coaching is that you can make a huge difference in your life just by looking at things differently, having a new perspective and making new choices.

What will you take away from this coaching exercise?

Focus the session: What was the most significant part of this session?

Create an action plan: What is one thing that you are willing to do to support your choice? What action are you willing to take? Write it down.

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